Twitter Snob? Why, but WHYYYYY?

Published on 10 March 2013

Okay, you know me, I always need to justify myself, and when I see the flood of insults I got on my last article, I feel I need to clarify a few points. On that note, I'm actually really surprised by some people's reactions. I feel like I've written way trashier, more aggressive, or more idiotic stuff over the past few years… without provoking such reactions. So I'm going to elaborate on a few points. Okay?

Yes, I'm a snob.

I say it myself, obviously it's idiotic not to follow people who have few followers, or not to follow people who don't follow me. It's twisted, and dumb. I'm perfectly aware of it, and once again, reread me, I say it myself. The point is that indeed, when you reach a certain level of visibility, anywhere, you fall into certain more or less ugly bad habits. And yes, indeed, when you have a lot of people talking to you, all day long, you can tend not to reply to everyone, and to "prioritize." In my case, I do prioritize based on the somewhat dumb criterion of notoriety and influence. I'd be more inclined to take the trouble to reply to someone with 10,000 followers than to someone with 14. You find that ugly? Snobbish? Big-headed? Well yeah, maybe, and yeah, it's ugly. I know. I think most people do this. And those who don't are very strong. I'm thinking, for example, of @Korben, who I regularly see reply to people with no visibility whatsoever. I admire him for that. And I'm convinced plenty of others have picked up this habit. I'm working on it too, and honestly, I try to reply to as many people as I can on Twitter, believe me.

English gets on my nerves.

Yeah, to each their own quirks, we all have hang-ups, some people told me in the comments that spelling mistakes were a dealbreaker for example, whether in my articles or on Twitter. Well, why not? No one's going to force you to read people who write in text-speak. Me, I have this thing with English. I don't like people speaking English in France, I don't like the "stylistic effect" of "I speak English to look cool," it tires me out, and I simply don't feel like reading dozens of articles in English all day. So if you only tweet in English, I won't force it on myself. It's not snobbery, I just maybe don't have your level in English, so I tire quickly, nothing serious.

You're a pain @Paingout

Now, I'm going to tell you something: in life there are plenty of things that are hard to choose. Your family, your colleagues, your constraints, your environment. But alongside that, you can make choices. You can choose your friends, choose your TV program, choose your dinner menu. When I choose my followers, it's EXACTLY as if I were choosing the TV program that keeps me company every day. And my criteria, your criteria, are nobody's business but my own. Here, let's flip it around. What if it were you opening your grouper mouths to explain why you don't follow me? I'm going to give you 10 good reasons not to follow me. 10 good reasons that make my Twitter account a pain for hundreds of people:

• I speak badly, I use vulgar words, it's unbearable.

• I LiveTweet ugly shows on TV.

• I regularly post smutty content, naked girls, and frankly not-classy photos.

• I often write in all caps.

• I constantly RT messages that make no sense, one-word tweets, idiotic expressions.

• I have a stupid fixation on phone carriers, I loop on it, and it's annoying.

• I'm a SNOB, I don't reply enough to people.

• I put unicorns or Mary Poppins as profile pictures myself, even though that's one of my dealbreakers.

• I make spelling mistakes regularly.

• I keep talking about AIDS or CANCER to describe the people or things that annoy me, it's super not classy.

There you go, I too do annoying things, ALL THE TIME, and because of that, people don't follow me. And that's VERY GOOD.

And in the end, are the people I follow really that great?

Conversely, those rules of mine that I mention, I'm telling you, deep down I actually tolerate tons of people who don't fit the mold! Don't take an article like this one literally!

• Users like @Clyne, @Chandleyr, or @Koreus don't have a photo as their profile picture, and yet I follow them with pleasure!

• Bios in English? @Joffrey, @EasyAlexis, @Rrfly, they all have bios in English, and I love them.

And more, @ValerieCG does ugly replies regularly, @JNChaintreuil posts teenage-girl quote-tweets, @Praska, @Megaconnard, or @damiendouani follow more than 1,000 people, and yet it wouldn't cross my mind to stop following them! Then imagine, @Yselicious, @__fanny__, @mlamelot, they all have fewer than 200 followers, and I follow them too!

Screw your marketing.

There are a few assholes who thought my article was a lesson in marketing or community management. Reread it one more time, I'm talking about myself. You're on my personal blog, I'm talking about my life, about Vincent, about Paingout, about my Twitter account, about my desires, my pleasures, my habits. This is nowhere near a list of rules or "tips," it has neither the substance nor the form. Anyway, all this to say that basically, you need to chill. It's not that serious, all this. Okay? Shall we hug it out? (You bunch of congenital big jerks) (RHA, SORRY)

Photo credit: AI-generated illustration

By Paingout